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Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Signs Signs Everywhere Signs







We carry our signs. Oh, yes. Pretty little signs with mosaic pieces put together from fragments of our life. Each sign we carry is meant to distract us from who we really are, who God intended us to be. So each day we march to and fro, trying to distract the world with these signs, hoping they won’t see the real us.

Signs made from birth resembling our hearts desires as little girls or little boys. Maybe there is a sign in which we carry, covering up the pain of a lost love—be it a mother, father, or a lover. We search—going through love after love. We desire the “perfect” romance. But, nothing fills the void.

Or maybe —our pretty sign is painted as; “look at me, all my make-up to hide the real me. If you saw me, you wouldn’t like me.” Or the sign of the woman that buries herself in the activities of the church, she can never be found out there! She’s safe. Or so she thinks.

Men, their signs are to be strong and hide their emotions. “Big boys don’t cry”, right? Heaven forbid, the raw, undulating emotions of a man, “you” should be exposed! That, you, really need to sit and talk and say, I’m scared or I need help. What would that say about you? Isn’t that what Satan whispers in your ear? Isn’t that what society whispers in your ear?

Our wounds are deep. And the depths in which we will hide are as deep as the Ocean. A place no man has ever gone, as this is where the truth lies. Maybe, just maybe, God won’t find us there and all that “it” implies. For deep in our hearts shame has made its home. We will find that we no longer make eye contact with those that may find the truth of who we are. Avoidance – just maybe we won’t be found out.

This is where we have lived all our life. This is what Satan would like for us to believe….

But the truth is Christ has the answers. For everything. He is the only One who can fill the void in our life. The only One who can carry our signs.

Christ came…. (John 10:10)

Christ lived….

And Christ gives us life through His grace-filled air….the air we breathe….

Breathe Jesus


Monday, July 30, 2007

Are You Walking Around With A Donut Bag On Your Head?

"Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed..." (James 5:16)

One Saturday years ago, my husband woke me up at 5:00 a.m.. I thought to myself as I was coming out of a deep sleep, this house had better be on fire. After all, it's Saturday, my day, my only day to sleep in.

My husband whispered into my ear, 'You've got to see this."


As we walked into the Great room, he said, "Where is Aggie?" (this is our Welsh Corgi dog). She quietly walked towards my husband as if nothing were out of the ordinary. Both of us were rolling in laughter as we looked at her with a Krispy Kreme donut bag tightly stuck on her head. She had apparently gotten into the garbage during the night. (A bad habit of hers) I'm sure she was hoping we wouldn't notice.

How often do we as Christians approach God with blatant sin, hoping He too will not notice?Oh, I'm sure there are times He also may chuckle, but then there are other times, it causes Him great Fatherly sorrow.

My husband finally pulled the donut bag off Aggie's head. There she went about her business of the day.

If we approach our Abba Father, He will help us get back on track. Basically, pulling the donut bag off of our head.

Remember "it's not perfection, but direction" in the life we live.

In Him,

Sunday, July 29, 2007

Honoring Our Troops





Today, let us honor our troops. Visit here. This video was done by a 15-year-old girl.




In His Love,

Saturday, July 28, 2007

The Pruner





“…. which means our bodies will be made free” ( Romans 8:23)


When we were born, we were like a small flower in a tight little bud waiting to bloom. Through life’s circumstances, some of us became beautiful flowers on the vine. Some of us changed colors according the soil we were raised in. Some of us unfortunately withered on the vine as the soil did not sustain life. But most of us, bloomed to a full life of what God had intended.

Depending on the type of flower, we may live a day, a week or many months. Our seasons are all different, aren’t they?

Ever notice the life of a flower? Tightly wrapped in a bud, then they start to bloom, with beautiful little pedals, their skin is so smooth and perfect.
Eventually, the elements take their toll on the skin of the flower and the pedals begin to wrinkle and wither. Ultimately, the season has come that the life of this flower is over.

The pruner—will come and gently remove the dying flower to allow growth of other flowers on this vine.

Our Heavenly Father, when our time has come, comes and picks us up in His arms and takes us home so that our families may grow, love and live in ways only the Father knows of. For the season of the precious loved one has come and gone.

And it is their time to go home to their Pruner.

May God bless all those who have lost a loved one…. May you have peace knowing they are in the arms of our Abba.

Friday, July 27, 2007

What Are Your Favorite Things?








I was tagged by Denisiepoo over at Shortybear's place for this meme. A little good Friday fun.....(Thanks my sweet friend)



What were you doing 10 years ago?



Raising a one-year -old, 9-year- old and 13 year-old

working as an Orthopaedic Case Manager in the Hospital


GUYS-NOT living for the Lord, ouch! although, we were in church.



What were you doing 1 year ago?



Working as a Director of Outpatient Surgery.


Working as a Christian Counselor (still am)


Raising a 10 year old.. the daughters are raising themselves--one is in college, one is married with our grandson.. smile


Absolutely living for the Lord.. Hallelujah \o/





Five Snacks You Enjoy:



I love the low fat chocolate Popsicles


I love popcorn


ummmm cheesecake

(Definitely not lowfat)

Love brownies... but take them out of the oven a few minutes before they are done.. drives my daughter crazy...


strawberry shortcake




Five Songs That You Know All The Lyrics:



OK.. you are going to die... I Think I Love You by the Partridge Family... I still sing it.. What is that giggling about.. I do...


Over in the Meadows is my son's favorite....


You are my Sunshine is my Daughters... ( I didn't have my oldest stepdaughter when she was a baby so I didn't get to pick a favorite for her... now she'd ask me to NOT sing to her.. )


Total Praise - Brooklyn Tab


Gosh.. I really have a lot that I wish I knew.. and I'm brain dead right now...



Five Things You Would Do If You were a Millionaire:



I would live right where we are....amen....God gave us this beautiful home... I'll have to tell you about that sometime..


yea,,, who doesn't have debt... well some don't.. but pay that off...


Definitely-- use it for the good of charity..


My mom...my dad's needs...in-laws... our children's needs--after they finished school..


I would let God show me where it needed to go...


one of our docs here in my home town just won a million dollars the other day.. go figure...



Five Bad Habits:



I'm guilty of the computer monster...


Pride....ms. know it all..


Jumping to conclusions...not waiting for the other side of the pancake to flip(hey,,, there is a devotional in that)


I'm a clutter bug..drives my hubby crazy... then we go through a throwing away party


I'm bad about harbouring or hiding my emotions




Five Things You Like To Do:



Read


Journal


Write Devotionals


Blog


Talk to my husband / kids / family


(No particular order here)




Five Things You Would Never Wear Again:



Those skirts with the scratchy underlay slips under it... ouch, yuck,, I cried as a girl.. hated it....


Overalls... sorry, I look like a good year blimp


short shorts.. those days are so over..


non supportive strapless bra's... omg... the last time... it ended up at my belly button... not a good thing....while I was at a restaurant..


tight tank tops... unless I'm trying out for an Oscar Meyer sausage commercial...



Five Favorite Toys:



I love toys....


Those Q12 toys.. I love them


computer games.. there is a Bible game that my mother in law sent me.. love it


Chess... LOVE it... my dad and I use to play... and now, I can play the computer.. not as much fun but I need to get good again so I can play my dad... smile


I love to play ball with my son.. my hubby said I throw like a boy anyway...


I love to blow bubbles.... wonder what that is about? therapeutic....



thanks for coming, reading and enjoying (assuming you enjoyed)...



I would love all of you to participate.. because I can get to know you.. .let me know when you write yours and I'll come and visit.. or leave yours on my comments...


PS.. If haven't been on the computer much since my new job... wow.. it's busy.. but.. I will visit you all this weekend..... blessings and love to you ...


Blessings in Him,

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Walk A Mile In Their Shoes








"Do not judge or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. (Matthew 7:1-2)


When I was a little girl…. And I might say, “Oh look at that person, they are….” My grandmother would quickly correct me by saying, “You don’t know what their life is like until you walk a mile in their shoes.”

I have grown up and I still sometimes catch myself judging someone before I think, but quickly a little voice nudges me and says, “….until you walk a mile in their shoes”. Between the seeds my grandmother planted and the twinge of the Holy Spirit, I can choose to pick up and walk in their shoes or judge them from the shoes in which I walk. I have a choice to obey its voice or ignore it and have it tug at my heart.

“Man”—still tries to take God’s Word and make it work for “this” world. But God is specific in what He says, “For My ways are not your ways” (Isaiah 55:8)… Judging others? DON’T. Period.

When the Holy Spirit “explodes” in our souls, we feel our heart staring to beat faster, our throat tightens, our mouths dry out, and our palms start to sweat… it is then that our Papa steps aside as only a Gentleman would… and say, “This is your call.”

Whose shoes will you walk in? Better yet, offer them your shoes?

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

What Season Are You In? Ecc 3






For every thing and every time has its Season. Click here


Ecclessiastes 3




In Him,

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Little Red Hearts Coming Your Way

elouai's doll maker 3


Today, I am sending my "Little Red Hearts" your way.. May God bless you in ways that you know could only be of "Him"....

Monday, July 23, 2007

Are We Living A Martha Life?



(Luke 10:41-42) “The Master said, "Martha, dear Martha, you're fussing far too much and getting yourself worked up over nothing. One thing only is essential, and Mary has chosen it—it's the main course, and won't be taken from her." The Msg.


This past Sunday our Pastor told a cute story about a little town of about 200 people or so. They had heard they had a visitor. “Paul Newman” it had been rumored was visiting this little town. One particular day during the visit, a woman decided to go get her usual (double scoop chocolate ice cream—a woman after my own heart) and as she walked in, she noticed in the corner of the ice cream shop at a table was a man with the most gorgeous blue eyes. Yes, she had heard the rumor. Yes, she thought this was probably –him—Paul Newman. In the brief moments, she thought better of it and decided she would remain totally cool, and not act like some of those “other “screaming fainting crazy women but instead very dignified. After all, isn’t this an everyday occurrence in this small town of 200 --- people like Mr. Newman just happen up in their ice cream shop? So out of her dream state she looks back at him, he nods at her and she nods back. Wow, she’s cool, she thought.

So, she orders her ice cream and as she gets her money, ice cream and gathers her purse, she walks out of the store and gets into her car. She is thinking “I’m good.” I deserve a Grammy award for this performance.

She sits for a moment and realizes there is a small problem….. Where is her ice cream? She starts to sweat. "No way”, she thinks, she has forgotten her ice cream. Now, she has two choices here. Does she go back in and look like an idiot or does she drive away and look like an idiot? Either way, she lost her focus in those big blue eyes and now it shows. The ice cream cone is sitting in the cone holder and she’s busted, right?!

She sucks (I doubt my Pastor said “sucks” it up) it up and walks in the store. She looks at the cone holder, it’s empty. So, she asks the girl behind the counter and the little girl shrugs her shoulders as if she has no idea. The woman looks around, slowly, like r.e.a.l. s.l.o.w., panic is starting to take over. She looks over at Mr. Blue Eyes and hoping he isn’t paying a bit of attention to this disastrous situation, but oh is he ever. Paul, I mean Mr. Newman says, “Mam, you put your ice cream cone in your purse!

Distracted.

Are you ever distracted?

Cell phones? Computers? Ever watched our college aged kids with a cell phone? They can’t go 10 minutes without a phone call or text message. Take “it” (cell phones) away from them for one hour. I believe panic would set it.

Relationships? Distraction sets in when they(the other person) defines mine / your worth.

Blogging. Oh bloggers.. I love my blogging friends and my blog. Just ask my hubby. But can it become a distraction? Yes, when it becomes life. I have to remember its purpose in which I started blogging…. A journal for Jesus Christ. Friendships—sure…. BUT, when I start to seek my worth through the approval outside of this, I’m no longer finding the life through my Savior. And this is a huge distraction.

Each day, we are faced with distractions. It’s how we choose to handle these distractions that will determine what our lives will look like.

From the beginning of time, we have been given a choice… and we are still given a choice. Even though, we may have our Salvation wrapped tightly up as ours forever, what about the abundant life? Do we want the abundant life Christ promises (John 10:10) or do we wish to live tired and worn-out?

Do you want to be a distracted Martha?

Or do you want to be a Mary, sitting at the feet of Jesus?

It’s our choice; do we want to live like Mary in a Martha world?

Embrace the main course – embrace our Jesus!

Saturday, July 21, 2007

So Where Do The Pets Go





Did I mention how much I love my job as a Hospice Nurse? Some of you have asked how its going....


Well, I LOVE IT....


Anyhoo, a nagging question came to me this week as we visited numerous patients....


See, a majority of these patients have "beloved" pets. And these pets LOVE their owners.... our patients....


When we would check on the patient, many times, the covers would start moving and out would poke the most precious little eyes of a dog or cat.


If they (the pets) could talk, I could just seem them saying, "I'm checking on my momma or daddy."


So what happens, when our patients die?


And they will, that is why we are called in. Many times the patient is more worried about their pet than anything else.


Part of the Hospice Care is to find placement for the beloved's pet. Did you know that? I didn't until I started working here....


Most of the time, a friend or family takes the pet, but sometimes Hospice has to find a home outside of the family. And they do. Not only that.... sometimes, to help the grieving process, a pet may be brought in.....(before you think, this is cruel... these pets were without homes before this.. and are going to be placed in a good home and loved)


Patients will "hang on" until they know their little beloved is taken care of....


God's little gifts....are sometimes the biggest gifts of all.........

Have a supernatural weekend

Friday, July 20, 2007

Humpty Dumpty




“And The king and his men…., said to David, "even the blind and the lame can ward you off." They thought, "David cannot get in here." Nevertheless, David captured the fortress of Zion…” (2 Samuel 5:6-7)

“And all the kings’ horse and all the kings’ men could NOT put Humpty Dumpty together again…”

Don’t we feel that way some days…. ??

That our life is beyond God’s grasp, beyond His help, beyond our control and surely beyond His control? Some days I just feel like ol’ Humpty Dumpty after he has fallen off the wall.

But just look at what God said about David, He said, “Nevertheless”, meaning “in spite of this”! Great visual for others in our life that are watching us-- or better yet, as we see our self --"as a broken Christian." I sometimes wish I could carry a broken shell on my head. See, my broken life! Isn’t this the life we experience for our self as a Christian?

For Job, in his pitiful, self-centered state, when he finally learned to pray for his friends, in spite of his hardship, God restored his losses.

In spite of Peter’s betrayal, he became the rock of the church, Jesus’ biggest fan.

Joseph was imprisoned, in spite of that, he preached!

In spite of my life of abuse, I will be able to walk others through freedom of shame and guilt.

In spite of blindness, my sweet friend Ivey sees the word through God’s eyes.

In spite of your weakness, beware---this where God is going to use you in a mighty way.

In spite of this, -- we have a choice, we can respond to the Holy Spirit chokehold or the Devil’s chokehold… (2 Corinthians 10:4)

And God put all of His people back together again…… (John 3:16)

In spite of us…..


Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Sticks and Stones







"Sticks and stones can break my bones but words will never hurt me." I yelled back, as a little girl running away from words being said to me. But the truth is, those words did hurt, more than a broken bone ever would. And that pain still lingers on even to this day.

As I have grown older, I have been called many names in my 40 plus (smile) years of life. I have been called mom, honey, Connie, Con (my sister’s name for me), Mrs. Barris, but then there are the names I can't put down in a devotional. I have been called hurtful names by teachers, coaches, enemies and yes, even other Christians. I have harbored those lies from “these” names that have marred me and made a home deep within my heart.

Now, my private little world causes me great shame.

Now, I have grown to believe that I no longer am able to live up to the worlds
standards, nor Gods for that matter.


So, it is in this place of spiritual darkness, that I can either feed my self-pity or allow the “burst” of God’s splendor, truth, goodness, light, love and glory to fill my heart! (1Jn4:16) So, that I may replace its’ shame.

Who is calling me by name?

Abba Father has called us by name, a name He has chosen, through Christ, ("...the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name.... ” (John 10:2-3).") that we would only believe in the truth of God and not the lies of the world around us (John 8:44).


And He knows my name..... He knows yours!

We are His beloved



Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Time To Bloom



"Then the time came when the risk it took
to remain tight in a bud was more painful
Than the risk it took to blossom. "
Anais Nin~


We long for more---
more love ---
more recognition---
more friendships ---
more beauty----


But the world shades our chance of those great desires-causing us to wither on the vine...



It is only when we seek the "wellspring of life" (Prov 4:23), do we find the very essence of our soul embraced in the warmth of the Son.

In Him,

Monday, July 16, 2007

Milk and Cookies



I met a neat person the other day, Amy over at Milk and Cookies. Just so happens I did a devotional a while back about milk and cookies....

Hope you guys will go meet Amy and enjoy the devotional...

Hey, it's like milk and cookies...

Sunday, July 15, 2007

Thank you Jen, Thank you Jesus




Thank you Jen, such a might prayer warrior and thank you for acknowledging me of this award..

And on this sunday, the Lords day, I want to take this day to reflect on Him. For this is His award. For it is because of Him that I do what I do.


Award Created by Jocelyn Dixon at Lothlorien, Realm of the Lady of Light


“As for my award, it is called The Blogger Reflection Award. Why? The reason for the title is because this award should make you reflect on five bloggers who have been an encouragement, a source of love, impacted you in some way, and have been a Godly example to you. Five Bloggers who when you reflect on them you get a sense of pride and joy…of knowing them and being blessed by them. This award is for the best-of-the-best so consider who you pick, carefully. This award should not be given to just anyone. If you’re going to do the award don’t just write a few words and slap it on your blog. Write real thoughts about these bloggers and what they’ve been to you, and if the bloggers you pick have already been given the award, don’t be afraid to give to them again. They deserve it as many times as it’s given.


If you would like to read what Jen wrote, you can click on her name above and scroll on over...

I love that all the glory and honor is going to the Almighty precious One...

And I must now choose 5..... how hard is that?

Let me start with the first...

1. This person is my whole reason for blogging...He helped me get started....honestly.. He is my reason... He Rocks... He Digs... He's all that... He's Jesus....I love Him.... And yes.. He is our reason for the whole blogsville in the Christian realm... is He not??

2. Let me honor this person for being the encouragers of all encouragers... some how she always has the right words to say.....she's always there...not a day goes by that I don't hear from hear.. cards, emails.. comments... They lift me up in the Lord... I know she does this for a lot of us but she makes me feel like I am the only one in the world ..... she is so worthy of this award.. My friend, Denise at Shortybears place.

3. A Friend at Healing Hand.. I haven't been reading her blog for long but in the time I have, she has the most awesome bible stories. I learn so much. Her blog truly reflects the life of Christ. Her comments are very uplifting. You truly feel the peace of the Holy Spirit when you are on her blog. I am very drawn to her beautiful place....

4. Forgiven4this, what a woman of God... She so blesses me..."I am a Christian, who is dedicated to the truth...the Living word of God. I am home schooling my children this year, and am totally blessed to have this opprotunity. I want to share this journey with everyone who stops by".. I so admire her as she lives out of the positive of what God has given her.. Not the down side of being a single parent... four children! she is just beautiful....

5. This one is a little different... she is "sort of"in the blog world.. she is a lurker...she has her name.. but doesn't actually have her blog set up YET....she leaves comments on MY site often.. she is my encourager... she loves Jesus.. she keeps me sane... she has walked by my side ALL my life... I LOVE HER.. and she's my best friend in life... she goes by Christa's mom.. she is my sister.... you can see her picture on my web through some of the slides I have done.. yes she is younger... and yes she deserves lots of awards for putting up with me... plus you guys should help her walk through forgiveness for all I did to her growing up.. smile..


But most of all, to GOD be the glory for great things He hath done... for without Him, I would not be doing this.... May this blogging always be about HIM... always....


Saturday, July 14, 2007

Tag, I'm IT







My friend Laura tagged me,,, and I thought this was pretty cool.... so let's play..



Here is how to play: If you had the opportunity to do a 1-year internship in a company or field completely unrelated to your current career or specialty, what would be your top 5 choices?



1. Always wanted to be a Marine Biologist... right up there with Jacque Cousteau. And if you ever wonder where I got my email address... fishnparrots... here is a parrot fish....I caught one of these little creatures one time....



2. Next-- I'd like to be a CSI dude....I realize I'm sick...but I think it would be too cool



3. OK.. this is kind of related to my job but I always wished I had done this... been a flight nurse...



4. Work with Beth Moore's team.. I'd sweep her floor and counsel the crew that were having a bad day.. LOL



5. a Carpenter... if it was good enough for Jesus, ....smile

I"m tagging my sister.... I want to hear her dreams...





Friday, July 13, 2007

My Last Day At Work

My last day at work.. I danced with the best group of people and they taught me beautiful steps that I will hold close to my heart. We have laughed, we have cried.
But I will move on to the place God has called me. I am at peace knowing my Papa is holding my hand.
These great people will always be a part of me...and I will cherish our love, our journey together..

Enjoy...






Christ Revealed / In Memory of Knox






This month will be 6 years since the death of my dear friends 9-year-old son. And as I think about how special Knox was, I want to remember him and his love for Jesus at such a young age. Before he died, he had asked his dad to read the Bible to him. Even though their plans were cut short, after his death, his dad went to the cemetery and read the Bible each day for one year until his dad completed the Bible--fulfilling his last wish.

Do you believe that God speaks to us in very intimate ways, giving us miraculously moments reassuring of us His peace? If not, maybe you shouldn't read this.


Matthew 14:27 - At once, Jesus said to them, "Don't worry! I am Jesus. Don't be afraid."

Admittedly, I was afraid that day as I drove home from my friends' house just hours after Knox's death. I was devastated. I was angry. I was overwhelmed in disbelief. In a split second, Knox had died coming home from a soccer game. His life was over and his family's life would never be the same.

As I drove home, I looked out my window and questioned God, "How could you?"

Even through my anger, my Abba spoke, He comforted me. For directly facing me out the window was a perfect form of Christ's face and hands. Hands that looked to be holding a small child ---a view portrayed on the road in the reminiscence of a puddle. There were no other puddles anywhere else on the road except for this spot. Without a shadow of a doubt, I know that He (God) revealed Himself to me that day. It has taken me a long time to share this. Up until now I have only confided this to my friend and a few very close friends.

God had taken home my friends little boy. I still question why but I know now that it is not for me to know at this point. However, I do know that God will reveal the answer to that question one day--- In the Heavenly realms.

So as our Papa says, "Fear not" --I know there are different fears... actual fear which you can almost taste, fear of the unknown, and fear (the best kind) where you hold the Lord in awesome reverence. I felt fear like the women felt when the angel of the Lord appeared to them to announce the resurrection of Christ.

There was hope and peace the moment Christ revealed Himself on that day.

Really though, doesn't Christ reveals Himself to all of us? Daily.


I would love for you to share your "Christ Revealed" stories with me...



In memory of Knox Britt.


Thursday, July 12, 2007

I AM Lesson 10


Want to be totally blessed? Visit Lisa, The Preachers Wife and join this Bible Study.

Discussion Questions:
1. Have you ever experienced trials that were best dealt with "in the family" for either your reputation's sake or God's? You may still choose to leave them there, but you are welcome to share if you are comfortable.


* When I was a young girl of 9, I was molested by a family member (not my dad, he reads this and almost stroked the first time he found out). I had lived with that secret for most of my adult life. In that, I carried a great deal of shame and guilt.

I never told my mom because she would not have believed me at that time in her life. But part of me always wanted her to know. I didn't want to tell my dad bec. well you just don't tell your dad these things. It's like he will look at you differently from then on out. It's the whole shame thing.

When I completed my ministry at GMI (Christian Counseling, Inc) in 2003, 48 hours to be exact, God openned more like slammed the door wide open for me to tell my mom what had happened through a similiar experience with another family member.

Then......my mom wept.

The damage had been done, but fortunately I had already walked through forgiveness --- now it was her turn.

2. Have you ever found yourself in a bizarre circumstance and later were able to walk someone through the same/similar situation? Did you recognize the hand of God in it?


Bizarre-- quite an understatement I might say....

But walking others through the same situation, ahhhhh, 2 corinthians 1:3-5, Father of all comfort. so that I may comfort others....

Daily.... yes... in counseling, in life... God has so blessed me in ministering to others by walking along side those that are hurting... I can say, "I know how you feel" because I do.

3. I was in my late twenties before I ever let myself believe God was for me instead of waiting to smack me upside the head everytime I made a mistake. Do you truly believe God is on your side?

I was almost 40, when that ol' measuring stick.... smacked me right upside the head... and I say measuring stick, because I was forever measuring myself to other Christians... instead of following my own path that God had laid out for me... Don't cha' just hate that...smack smack smack...

So no wonder... it sounded like fireworks....

And I looked at God "In the beginning" like I did my parents.. as disciplinarians... not until our relationship grew to where it is did I understand the love, "unconditional" love that it truly is and always will be...

4. If God has ever had you in the Holy Spirit Chokehold (and who hasn't He?), how have you reacted to God's chastisement? Were you bitter? Brokenhearted? Grateful?

Lisa, girl.. I love you... I love this... HOLY SPIRIT CHOKEHOLD.. I have to remember that....I can just envision my feet hanging off the ground at times as I am soooooo hard headed... PRIDE... nah, never....

Not too long ago, God and I wrestled to the ground... well I didn't win...Praise Him...Never for a second was I upset... I thank Him daily.... Why can't I get it...???

5. Write a brief prayer of Thanksgiving for God's longsuffering.

Oh Papa, I praise You in my weakness,
I praise You for the roads I've traveled
for they have brought me to the place
I am today---in Your arms...



Always Remember




TODAY, I am wrapping up at work, I have many mixed emotions.... Mostly, I'm tearful... so this has been very helpful for me in the past as well as today.. I hope it ministers to someone out there that may be in a situation of need of comfort.



Always Remember


when God Made you


He did so with a


Purpose and a plan


He saw all your days before


you lived one of them


and placed over


you the covering


of His protective love.


He has allowed nothing


to come into your life


has not first been


screened through that love.


His hand has remained


upon you to this very day.


He calls you by name.


You are His beloved child...


the apple of His eye....


The delight of His heart.


Today you are in the exact


place He wants you to be,


and tomorrow He


will be with you


as He has always been--


in goodness, in kindness,


in faithfulness.



(Roy Lessin)



Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Jayne's Song




I will sing of the mercies of the Lord forever.......(Psalm 89:1 )


One day, I was on the way to work and listening to my favorite Christian radio station, when the song "I Could Sing of Your Love Forever" came on. Out of nowhere I began to cry.


Fortunately, I had a short drive to work because the tears made it very difficult to see. As I sat in my car (trying to get composed), I realized I was continuing another day here on Earth and my best friend, Jayne, was fulfilling the ultimate hope of this song in Heaven.

As I shared with you in yesterday's post all the recent events of facing issues regarding the person that took Jayne's life, my recent walk through forgiveness that has blessed me with a sure freedom, peace now transcends over me in a bittersweet moment of knowing Jayne is in the presence of our Savior.


Life is like that. One must know sorrows to appreciate the joys. In our sorrow, we are given glimpses of a promise and hope of our future.


Even in the sadness of life's storms, peeking through the clouds is the very joy that comes from singing of God's love forever...

In Him I sing of His love forever,

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

My Journey Partners




Walking The Road Of Forgiveness






Our Nation is numb.

Grief? It's everywhere. We no longer pay attention.

I believe the world looks at tragedy ---day in and day out --- through desensitized goggles. The woes of our tears and fears no longer flow like the waves of the ocean, instead it trickles in like a hot day on a stagnant pond. It has a putrid stench to it but we have grown accustomed to its presence. We no longer respond to the killings of small children, mass casualties nor do we became alarmed at escalated terrorist alerts. It has becoming a way of life.

Or has it?

Not until it hits our life personally.

Let me share a story with you. One that I have held close to my heart for 26 years now, and no doubt has dramatically changed me.

In the matter of minutes on a June night, my life changed, forever. I still to this day, have twist, turns, ups and downs. But as I stand here today, I can reflect back and through all the pain, I can share the utmost joy through my Abba's love as He walked hand in hand, intimately with me through this journey, teaching me about His love, His grace and most of all, His forgiveness. He has shown me what His hope of a future truly means (Jer 29:11), and what His promise will one day be like and yes that includes being with Jayne again.

Little by little, the stacks of self-pity were tossed away and more of me was revealed. Of course, I didn't like "me" very much. I had become a very angry person.

You see I had lost my very best friend. This so-called God of ours, mine, this loving God that everyone praised had taken my best friend. Not just that, a man of God had taken her life. I was angry. I was bitter. I was living in a world of such self denial and self righteous indignation. I considered myself above most others for whatever reason. Oh, God had so much to teach me.

But His love sought me for years. Looking back this still brings me to tears.
Eventually, I "allowed" Him to catch me. I was hurting and I wanted Him. It was more like me turning around and falling into His arms.

But there was still this one little thing that kept us apart.

I couldn't forgive the man that took my best friend from me. Surely God would understand, right?

Didn't I have that right?

"Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me." (Psalms 51:10)

What I am about to share is the most incredible "God thing" I have ever experienced. I would compare it to the "Burning Bush" for Moses, to the Parting of the Seas and many other miraculous events in the Bible, but this was my miracle.

As I have shared with you all, God is using me to minister through Christian Counseling. I have had one particular person that I have counseled for several years now and she has been sharing with me how she had become close friends to a particular person. And the time had come when she would prepare for the homecoming of her friend's husband. Her concern was that her friend's husband had been in prison for many years.

Now, I had heard this for weeks but finally, on this chosen evening, she revealed the name. On that day, with no doubt in my mind, God had scheduled that appointed time; and He prepared the evening by cancelling my following appointment leaving me open for the evening. Minutes before my counselee was to leave from the meeting, she revealed the name, and this was when my world came crashing down on me. The room started spinning and I couldn't breath; I thought I would die if the earth didn't first open up and suck me into it. The person she named was the man that murdered my best friend years ago. He was my friend's little girls' Sunday school teacher.

No, I had never forgiven him. Did I want to? No, I didn't.

But I was about to walk this person through forgiveness for things that had happened in her life and I know that God would not allow that until my own forgiveness had been handled.

I also know that God would have never orchestrated that without total assurance that I was ready. So that week with the help of a dear friend, I walked through forgiveness. Had God not called me to do that, I would not have made the effort.

God had gently whispered to me "My Son died for this man just as He died for your sins."

It is in this, that brings me to total peace as I walked down my own road of forgiveness.



and... if you tell me, "I just can't forgive.... "well, I have a hard time buying that... for our Father, our Abba,, will surely walk you hand in hand down that road....and remove the shackles from the prison that have bound you to the lies (John 8:44) you have believed to this day....

"For My Son died...."

In Him,


Monday, July 9, 2007

For A New Season Has Come



For A New Season Has Come


Just as with the passing of any season, one may reflect in such a prevalent mood, which sometimes inspires one to consider a time for change.

For with the fullness of the seasons, these fruits have been picked, shared, and enjoyed with many memories to be cherished. The silent echoes of the passing of time as a new season creeps upon us, leaves us wondering what the new season will bring.

For me, I have embraced this change. As I carry many fond memories, friendships and wonderful gifts of intangible proportions, I will forever be indebted to each and every one of those I have worked with for so long. They have all taught me something special that I will forever cherish.

So as these last few days approach, and I leave my current job with a new excitement, know I will always hold those I have worked with for so long, close to my heart. I do not leave empty handed nor with an empty heart.

For in everything there is a time.... and in everything there is a season.... (Eccl 3:1)

May God bless you all…