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Monday, April 16, 2007

If God Gave Out Report Cards

(Matthew 6:30-33) "If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don't you think he'll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met." The Msg.

Thinking back on my childhood, I was in such awe of myself. I had this vision that I was a perfect student. More like this perfect little angel. Perfect child. Straight A's. I was every teachers dream. And of course, my parents favorite daughter. (Ok, my parents are thinking they have opened the wrong email) You can see that I obviously didn't have a humble bone in my body.

Then some years ago, my mother did the unthinkable. She brought a stack of my belongings to me from my childhood. And in that stack were my old report cards. Perfect, I thought. Here is the evidence to once prove my beliefs. Slowly, as I sat in the floor, I read through each report card. My grades read through like reading the alphabet. I didn't know you could get a Z. Maybe it was "Z" for zealous, what was that? And in the comments, "If Connie could just sit still". "If Connie wouldn't talk so much", "If Connie would just LISTEN". There I sat totally defeated. No angel here. If it hadn't read my name, I would have tried to convince you I had my sister’s report card. Sorry, Lynn!

As I am sitting here before my Papa, I am no different today. Sometimes, I think I am all that with my Abba. But if report cards were handed out, it might read, "Connie, if you could just 'Be still and know that I am God'". You see, I am still running ahead of my Papa. I still cannot rest in knowing He's in control. I think that He has not answered my prayers in Connie's time, so I will help Him. I wonder where He is. What a mess! Standing in the mess, I call out, "Papa, is this really my report card, is this really how it is?"

I am humbled by the truth. I sit and embrace its' truth. In Your mercy, I find that I have not missed out on anything. I just needed to wait on You.

It's not about making the grade, it's about God's-best.

How would your report card read?


4 little hearts from you...:

Sharon said...

Mine would read exactly the same way. I felt like you wrote my life story in this post.


Nise' said...

That is so like me as well... My "comments" would read.. "Denise is a dreamer", "If she would quit talking to her neighbor and get to work things would get done" "Denise is always in a rush and therefore does not put forth her best effort". I am still that way today! The teacher comments were such a big help in learning my kids' learning styles, bents, strengths and they are still valuable today as I help guide them(when asked by the older ones) thru this journey.

Linda said...

I LOVED this post. I can relate. Also, I love "Z" for zealous!

Christa said...

Great post. Thanks for this reflection.