A Season Passed

Some time ago I took a personality test. It revealed two things about me. Well, really more but mainly two things stood out about me -- the characteristics of a Golden Retriever - its gentle, loyal, laid back behavior... you get the picture.

And then interestingly that of a Lion. As you would expect, the characteristics of a lion are strong, dominant and ruling.

These two traits cannot coexist. So apparently one is a mask for the real me.

The question being -- Who am I?

First, let me tell you how this happens. A lion doesn't one day decide to become a dog. Even if he is raised by a pack of dogs. His true identity is to hunt and conquer. And eventually the lion's true character will overpower him to hunt.

Now take the reverse, if your precious retriever is mistreated, abused or hurt one time too many, he begins to defend himself. He attacks when threatened. He becomes strong. He loses his identity of who he really is, kind of sounds like a lion.

There is nothing wrong with being a lion if that is who you are. But in my case, I was not a lion. And this poor dog (aka me) had lived with the lions too long. I lost my stamina somewhere along my journey. By the grace of God!

My heart was weary and it cried out to the Papa. I fell before Him . A season came and it went. And there was silence. I don't know about you but I get nervous in that silence. I start seeking something... anything...

Be Still and know Me. (Psalm 49:10)

My heart was so heavy.

I waited. (it was like my 40 years in the desert)

Another season came and went

And another

Silence

Be Still....

I cried..."Oh Papa"

Then years and years later....my brokenness... I was stripped of everything... I had nothing left.. but myself totally dependant upon my Abba.

I heard His voice...."Rest" (Matt 11:28-30)

I had no where to go and nothing left. So, I rested in His arms....

And I finally heard Him speak.... it was so clear... I felt I was on Holy Ground...

As I wait on news of my dad.... I am at peace..... it is a watch and see... but there is peace

During the death of my friend Al... You showed me where my next Season will be...

Your perfect timing.......Your perfect Love........Your perfect Plan

That you have prepared me for a new life as a nurse and as a counselor. Who would have ever thought?!

You opened the door... as I now walk into a new journey as a Hospice Nurse. Walking away from the comforts of the job I have known for so long. Because you have shown me where I am to go. To walk...Thank you Al, in your memory I will hold my new role up with respect and honor in your name.

As my husband said, "How many people have the opportunity to walk people home to the Father"

Papa to see Your plan worked out so beautifully, I still stand in awe.....

Thank you....

For the sun sets on one season but will rise on a new.....

I am starting a new journey....